When I became a mom no one told me that my baby would drive me crazy some day. No one said that there would be a day when you just needed to be ALONE. Over the last (nearly) two years there have been times where I’ve wanted to just use the restroom solo–even the dog joins me now! I’ve also had moments where I just need everyone to remove all their hands, feet, toys, etc from my person so I can just be me without their attachments.
Today was one of those days.. That being said, I LOVE my boys. Liam has started cooing and smiling at me at random times that we aren’t suffering from his colic. (And by “we” I mean everyone in the house; Xander now shushes him if that tells you how often we’re trying to stop the crying!) And Xander has slowly become my mini-me in the way he loves cooking and painting and he’s also developed some of my not so great habits. (Like becoming very upset when he found out I painted after he went to bed last night!)
All the great parts of being a mom of two aside, today I needed a mommy vacation. The newborn crying and toddler tantrums got to me. Not being able to pee solo got to me. Not being able to even finish washing dishes even though Liam was attached to me REALLY got to me. So after dinner when Super Dad told me to go do something by myself and not come home for at least 30 minutes I jumped at the chance.
Did I do anything exciting? Not really. I tried calling a few college friends (to remind myself that I’m more than just a stay at home mommy!) and noone answered so I just drove. And drove. And drove. Thankfully we live where there are really pretty views so I just drove and enjoyed the view. And after about 20 minutes driving north, I turned back around expecting to get home and be thrown back into the chaos now that I was feeling refreshed. As I was turning onto our street one of my college friends called me back so I turned the car back around and drove so that I could enjoy a phone conversation without anyone crying or pulling the phone out of my hand “to talk”. After twenty minutes of a grown up conversation, I parked the car and braced myself for the screams. Imagine my shock when Super Dad had Liam asleep on the couch, and Xander was contently watching Signing Time.
It was a much needed reminder that as much as my boys need me, they’ll survive without me for a little while. Now I’m off to tuck my Xander bug into bed and find a babysitter so I can plan a date night for sometime soon.