Thirty Days Of Thankful: Failure

Garth Brooks has this song, you’ve probably heard it.  It says, “Some of God’s greatest gifts, are unanswered prayers.” I am a very firm believer in that statement.  In college I prayed and prayed that I’d pass the OSAT, the second test you take towards becoming a teacher in the state of Oklahoma.  For Spanish, when I was in school–it could have changed but I doubt it, the pass rate was something like 30% for Native Speakers.  I learned 95% of my Spanish IN college, so I definitely wasn’t even close to a Native Speaker, and I failed that dang test by 1 point.  ONE POINT!

Talk about failure!  I bawled like a baby when I got those test results in the mail.  I had found out I was pregnant with Xander TEN DAYS before those results came in.  I was a semester away from graduation and my only background plan was to change my major in order to graduate “on time.”  I ended up changing from Spanish Education to Spanish with a minor in psychology.  While I have NO idea what I’ll do once the time comes for me to go back to work, but I am VERY thankful for the psychology courses I took that last semester.

When it comes to the boys I fall back on the developmental psychology courses I took SO often.  Oh Xander is a total terror and is constantly telling me NO MOMMA! Well, Erikson says that’s just Xander learning to be autonomous.  Annoying, but at least there’s a reason.

Would I have probably read the information in some parenting book at some point? Maybe, but since I was going to be given a grade on my knowledge, I committed it to memory and I go back to it every time the boys are hitting a milestone, driving me crazy, etc.  Would it have been nice to have passed that dumb test, gotten my teaching certificate and be a teacher? Of course, but that would also mean that I’d have left Xander and gone back to work–and being able to stay at home with the babies is one of the things I’m MOST thankful for in my life.  So my failure was really just one of God’s unanswered prayers.

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